Tiff and Kristy go into the DNA of an effective leader. These are the common traits that Dental A-Team has seen from the top dental practices, with Tiff and Kristy breaking down how exactly these leaders were able to cultivate such characteristics.
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Transcript:
The Dental A Team (00:00)
Hello, everyone. Dental A Team listeners, thank you so much for being here. I had the pleasure of having an email exchange with a really, really well-rounded office manager, regional manager. And anyways, my point was that she mentioned that she is an avid Dental A Team listener, and she has been for many years. And it was just so special to hear that and to have this email thread with her and to hear how much it has impacted her
professional life and I just wanted to give a massive shout out that came up this morning and I wanted to just thank you guys for being here because as much as this may impact your life and and hopefully add value to your systems, your practice, whether you're a dentist, whether you're a team member, office manager, and you know what I mean we've worked with CPAs, we've worked with chiropractors, we've worked with eye doctors.
anyone who's here listening, you found value in this and you continue to come back or if this is your first time, welcome. And I just want to give a massive shout out to you guys and a thank you for supporting our team and our company through the podcast. We love being here and we love what we get to do with you guys every single day. So massive shout outs and welcome to today. I have the beautiful pleasure of honestly having a very relaxed and calming
podcasting day and I have Miss Kristy here with me today and Kristy, know I've told you off camera, off mic, ? how relaxing podcasting with you is and truly, truly from the bottom of my heart, you make podcasting very easy and stress free and knowing that we had a few today, really I was like, goodness it's Kristy, because I am just so excited to podcast with you. So Kristy, thank you so much for being here.
and just for being you. You bring a sense of ease, a sense of joy, and a sense of fun to our company as well as a multitude of other things and I value you. So thank you, Kristy. How are you this morning? It's still morning here as we're recording. How are you doing?
DAT Kristy (01:58)
doing well and I'm with you Tiff. I mean we don't get to spend a lot of time with each other so whenever we get to spend time even if it's podcasting ? I always enjoy my time with you so yep it's a good morning.
The Dental A Team (02:10)
Thank you.
Thank you. I agree. I agree. The sun is shining. It's supposed to be cooling down. So I'll be missing it. But you should be able to enjoy some great Phoenix weather here in the next week and enjoy that pool of yours. And when I get back, we need to set up a coffee date because it just hasn't happened yet. And we need that time together. I'm really excited. In a few weeks, we've got our in-person mastermind that we've got a ton of our doctors.
DAT Kristy (02:27)
Yes.
The Dental A Team (02:39)
coming out to Phoenix to spend some time with us. And I know I have a few doctors, you have a few doctors that are coming. Each consultant has quite a few actually offices that are joining us. We're just super, super excited to host everyone here in Phoenix. I am, my clients, my clients know who they are. They are near and dear to my heart. They are some of my closest friends in my life. And I have a couple coming that I am so excited for you guys to meet.
And one of them is just so special and she knows who she is and I'm just giving her massive hugs and massive shout outs. She is such a supporter of everything we do. She's a supporter of me as a human and you know, I just am so excited for you to meet her, Kristy. So I wanted to just shout that out and let everybody know what's coming up in our lives. We've got a lot of Dental A Team fun happening and part of that is this.
course this mastermind that we've got coming up and the things that follow it that go along with that. mean we've got every month we have our doctors only mastermind for our clients and most of what we do is center focused around really truly building leaders and ? within that I think I think something I tell my clients and my teams especially my teams when I'm working with teams is our goal is to create ease efficiency and joy.
in your jobs. No matter what your job is, no matter what your position you hold in the practice is, I want you to love going to do that every single day or at least I say like 95 % of the time there's going to be those days where you're like heck no Tiff I don't want to do this. But a lot of that comes down to I think effective leadership and being able to create a practice that works for you, a business that works for you instead of you working for the business, meaning it's just like gosh I'm exhausted every day and
Will this ever end? And new doctors, it does end. Okay, but not yet. Don't get too hasty. You gotta put your time in. You gotta do your time. But it does end. And Kristy, I think a lot of that, and something you're fantastic at, I've watched you do this with doctors. I've watched you do this with startup doctors. They know who they are. They're here listening too. And I've watched you do this with doctors who have been in practice for 10 years plus. You build incredible leadership.
through really solid systems and efficiency and culture and team. Kristy, my biggest question to you, I told you I was going to ask you this kind of defining question. When you think of a leader, when you think of a practice leader, a dentist leader, an office manager, and anyone who is deemed a leader or wants to be, what kind of characteristics do you think of within that person that either they innately have or can be developed?
DAT Kristy (05:27)
You're going deep today, huh? ? Yeah, I think number one, compassion because
The Dental A Team (05:30)
I am, yeah. I don't know what's up today, but I am. It's in me.
DAT Kristy (05:44)
With leadership, I think we owe it to our people to be brutally honest in a way, but do it in a compassionate way, if you will. the ability to be honest and share from that space of, want to better this person or I want to grow this person versus coming from a place of criticism.
You know what I mean? Because you and I have talked about this before. I don't think anybody walks into a job on any given day saying, I'm going to make it heck today. I'm just going to come in and raise havoc. And I don't think anybody intentionally does that. And so having a leader that can come from a compassionate space and understand that people really are trying to do well and be able to deliver from that space.
The Dental A Team (06:43)
Yeah, I totally agree with you. think compassion's a fantastic word there. And ? the way you described it, I think, defines that really clearly. Because I do think there's just so much confusion wrapped up in empathy, sympathy, compassion, being nice. And I think a leader is everything, is all of those pieces. But well-rounded and doesn't get lost in them is, I think, a good thing to say there. ?
They're all fantastic characteristics, but being able to navigate that and being able to navigate ? clear and kind, like I really, I really truly love looking at the difference between kind and nice. And I think, you know, nice, even when you say like, ? nice, it doesn't feel in your body as good as kind does. And when someone can be clear and kind, that's that compassionate side of I'm here with you.
And I'm going to tell you, I'm going to tell you the way I'm going to show you the way. Right. And when we get off track, we're going to do it together. And I'm going to tell you when we get off track, when you're off track, when, things aren't being met, when the accountability needs to be put into place, I'm going to do that for you because that's kindness. I think a lot of leaders shy away from that because they want to be nice. They don't want to hurt feelings. They don't want to make someone feel like they're not a good team member or they're not doing a good job because they are doing a good job. They're just doing something that needs adjusting.
And I know Kristy, you've had these conversations too. I've listened to you have them with doctors and office managers of the not saying something to someone holding back information and holding back what could inspire them or just make them a better manager and leader is actually hurting the other person. So where we're trying to be nice and save their feelings, we're actually making it way worse and we're doing damage.
to the human, the person, and that think, Kristy, is where that compassionate side comes into play of compassionate kindness, of that joint. always say, ? use words like I'm partnering with you, and can I partner with you in this? Are you open to me giving some feedback here? You really lay it out very well where it's open and, again, compassionate and kind. And Kristy, I think you do a great job with that.
How do you help to coach leaders and doctors to have those conversations and with verbiage like that? What are your biggest suggestions that even if somebody could take one thing away from today, maybe it's a suggestion of a hard conversation. ? How do you suggest to your doctors and your clients how they can do that?
DAT Kristy (09:25)
Yeah, I think there's a few things, Tiff. Honestly, in onboarding new people, I love to have the conversation before it even needs to happen. with new employees just opening the door that, hey, there's going to come a time when we have to address a few things. So finding out what their style is for addressing and always trying to accommodate in that way, I mean, you don't
always have the room to do that. But if I can find out, hey, there's going to come a time when we have to have a conversation, what is the best way to address you? How do you prefer me to approach you in those situations, first and foremost? And that obviously works well for new team members. But as we're learning leadership, we might not have all new team members. So coming into it,
for our existing team members just being vulnerable and honest and saying, hey, I'm looking to grow my leadership skills too, right? And so I may not always hit the mark, but I wanna open the door for honest open communication. And so just like what you said, asking permission and ? I guess with that too is in that approach, always trying to make it from my point of view.
You know, maybe referring back to a situation and being able to address it like, hey, you know, I need to clear the air. And earlier when you were talking about the story I'm telling myself is, I'm sure, you know, that may not have been your intent and that's why I wanna open this space for communication. Yeah.
The Dental A Team (11:17)
Yeah, that's beautiful.
That's beautiful. And what that leads into is kind of our next chapter of this whole podcast. And it so succinctly goes together because that communication that you just gave and that openness. I always think of when I when I hear you speak and when I hear you speak of ? verbiage to be able to use like this, I think of you said vulnerable and I think vulnerable for sure. We're open, we're vulnerable, we're honest. But I think you also bring a sense of ?
like humility and humbleness to the conversation. And when a leader and a doctor or anyone who an established team member who's been there for a while can be humble and say, you know what, don't know everything and I am growing and learning because I'm a human and we're doing that in every space of our life. Who I am today as a mom, who I am today as a girlfriend, as a best friend, as a friend, a coworker, who I am today is different.
than even two weeks ago, right? We're constantly changing. So being able to be humble allows the space for the other person, for the other, and when you're a dentist and leader or office manager, having these conversations with the team, either individually or open forum, like allows them the space to know. They don't have to know it all either. And they can be in the space of learning and they can ask questions. So.
Kristy, think one of the biggest things we get asked, well, number one thing we get asked when people call in and say, Dental A Team, please help fix my family, is systems, right? And I was actually in a practice yesterday with our consultant Trish, and it was so much fun. And we did the team meeting, and one of the things I said to the whole team was, listen, everybody says we need systems. We need systems implemented. And I'm like, for sure, you need systems.
But systems without communication and without leadership, you already have systems. You know why they're not working, why they're quote unquote broken. You have systems. You're doing a lot of the things I'm going to tell you to do. You're just not doing them consistently and you're not talking about it. So if we can fix the communication and really bring that sense of humbleness, think what you've done there, Kristy, with that conversation that I hope people will take away and go spread is you have inspired.
a culture of positivity. Because whenever we're in a space, we've hired consultants, we have people on our, we have team members on our team right now that have said, I have never worked in a place that I didn't feel like I had to know everything. And when I didn't know a thing, I was scared to say it and I had to like go find it on my own. So we're like behind the scenes trying to track down information and hoping we're right. I remember in my dental practice,
Kiera talks all the time about how she didn't know the definition. She didn't know what KPI stood for, right? She knew it was important. She didn't know what the actual acronym meant. I only knew, and I tell her this all the time, I only knew what KPI stood for because when I became a leader in my dental practice, the office manager wanted me to come into the KPI meetings. And I was like, yeah, of course, I'll be there. Sure thing, no worries. Meanwhile, I'm over here Googling. What the heck is a KPI meeting?
I had no idea, but I also wasn't comfortable enough to be like, yeah, sure, whatever you want. What does that mean? How do I show up? What do I bring? How can I be valuable to that meeting? I Googled it, and then I sat there like, none of this makes sense. I sat in those meetings with the CPA, and I'm just like, I am not, I'm not the same as you guys, and I feel so small right now. But I was not in ? an environment at that time that felt, and it wasn't because,
DAT Kristy (14:34)
you
The Dental A Team (15:03)
she wasn't supportive or helpful, I just didn't feel seen, heard, and ? like I could be vulnerable, right? I had to just be, you had to put on a face and you had to do the thing. And I think, Kristy, what you've done with that communication is you've opened up space for the culture to really be what our clients are constantly asking for. They're always asking, Tiff, how do I fix the culture, right, Kristy?
Help me fix my culture. How do I get my team engaged? And it's like, you just did it with one sentence, right? Have you seen that, Kristy?
DAT Kristy (15:36)
Yeah, absolutely. ? It's communication out of the gate. I don't know the exact statistic, you may know a little better than me, but I know it's up in the high 90 % that all communication is misunderstood just out of the gate. So we already have that going against us. Anything we can do to help open that door and create that safe space. And again,
I guess my biggest thing, if you kind of said, if there was one takeaway, don't ever start a sentence with why. Don't ever start a sentence with why because you'll automatically put them on the defense. Maybe asking a question of, you share with me how you came to this decision or not, why did you do this?
The Dental A Team (16:17)
I totally agree.
Yeah, yeah. think a lot of communication starts that way. And I think I try to encourage teams in general, people, when I go into practices and I'm having these meetings and I'm having similar conversations of teaching even just a full team how to communicate together, I actually try to encourage them to stop considering that they're two different people in their lives. Because we think
I'm at work, I have to be this person at work, but at home, like, are you saying if you were to go to your husband or your kid, like, I think of Brody, my 17 year old son, and for those of you who have been listening for a long time, he's 17 now, yes. But I think like, if I came to him and I was like, why did you do it like this? He'd be like, well, why wouldn't I have? And I'm like, well, that's not, like, I actually needed to know why you did it this way. And he's like, well, why are you asking, right? It would just be this like back and forth.
But instead, come almost like I tell people, think about how to get around it. The why this hard statement is the rock in between you guys. And if you try to push through that rock in the middle, you're not going to get anywhere. I massively hurt my wrist one time trying to move this rock that did not look as heavy as it was for years. My wrist hurt. That's what you're doing. But walking around that rock, walking around that boulder and saying,
I actually really want to understand because sometimes, Ray, I tell practices, if you don't agree with what I'm saying that we need to implement, like tell me because I could be wrong. I might not know your practice as well as I think I do and we need to talk through it. And that's the same thing. Like maybe we got a different result than we wanted, but I need to know how you got there because number one, if you use the system that's in place, it's broken. Number two, if we didn't use the system, we needed to know.
what we did use, right? So I think that's brilliant, Kristy, and really just a way to like get around that issue that's in the middle and keep defenses down.
DAT Kristy (18:27)
for sure. Another technique that I've used before and especially from leaders is make sure you keep speaking to the results you're looking for. It's painting the clarity for the person on the other end. What's the end result? What are we trying to achieve here that we're missing the mark? You know, another great thing is being able to state the behavior that you are seeing now, maybe even what it's causing.
You know, for instance, when you are in morning huddle and you go, what about, you know, can you see how that maybe drags everybody down and moving forward, stating the behavior you want to see moving forward? It's OK if you feel that way. But can you refrain from saying it in front of everybody? And you and I have a conversation on the side, you know. So again, it's what's the behavior today that's happening that
isn't so favorable, what's the result we want to see and speaking to that versus the person.
The Dental A Team (19:30)
I love that. And again, that is like infusing the care into the person and the situation. But like I want I want you to be looked at as a leader in your position. And I know, just from my own experience, when you do come to the table that way, people actually like the people lose trust in you, you lose value, right. And so I do agree being able to show up. And I think the flip side to all of this that I
of thought of while you were saying that piece, because that's massive, is being able to show up how you want others to and then backing this up. So there's a difference in having this conversation and just being like, cool, had the conversation, Kristy. My team didn't do anything about it. They don't care. They're not changing. And then having the conversation and walking the walk, backing it up and continuing. know, Kristy, you probably get asked this a lot too.
DAT Kristy (20:03)
Mm-hmm.
The Dental A Team (20:26)
They're like, well, how many times do I have to say it? They're not listening. And I'm like, they are, but they've been, if you're working with a team that's established, right, even established with you, they've been down a road already. So we're retraining behaviors and habits. But the only way to do that is by continuing to show up how you want them to show up. You can't tell someone, I can't tell Brody to do this thing. But if I do it, if I.
If I show him and care and love him enough to show him how to behave and how to be in the world, he mimics that, right? We are all just mirroring each other. We are literally duplicating and repeating what we're seeing. So if your team, this one's a hard truth, this just popped in, but if your team, you're like, my team sucks, be like,
Actually, you know what? Maybe I should look in the mirror and reflect to myself because if I look at my actions, I were mirroring myself and watching myself, how would I show up? Because if you're not walking that walk and you're like, yeah, sweet, vulnerable, humble, come tell me, and then somebody has a conversation with you and you're like, well, this is why, let me tell you why. Guess what you're gonna get when you say, why did this happen? You're gonna get the same behavior, right, Kristy?
DAT Kristy (21:30)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, 100%. You know me and my analogies, but we literally are a product of what we live, right? We learn what we live. And so if we're always coming from that critical spirit, we're going to get more of that, you know? So coming from that space of ? understanding, right, versus criticism. ? And to your point, it's coming full circle again.
A lot of times we don't lean into those difficult conversations and those literally are so powerful. Like really that's where our growth comes and I challenge people to see them as a caring conversation versus a negative conversation if you will. ? Really our growth comes from that and not addressing it is also validating the behaviors.
The Dental A Team (22:34)
totally agree.
Totally agree with you. That is, drop the mic right there. I totally agree. And that's that nice space, right? Where we're like, well, I don't want to make them feel bad. Well, you just told them it was okay what they're doing then. So either you have to get over that and be okay with whatever it is. You can no longer hold it against them. And it has become a standard of okayness or you have that conversation. Those are the only two options. That is a.
do or die, like only two options. You cannot personally or professionally continue to hold something against someone if you're not willing to help to change that behavior.
DAT Kristy (23:16)
Yeah, and you know, with that tip, I would say I was in that space too, when I was learning, learning to be a leader, because yes, we all have innate characteristics that can guide us to being a leader, but it is a muscle that has to be developed and leaning into those conversations had made me a better leader. But also, I would say having a mentor.
or a coach like us to practice the conversations can be very helpful. Before you get into those conversations, I tell my doctors that all the time. mean, think of professional football teams or baseball or whatever. I always say, how much time do they spend practicing versus how much time do they play on the field? And how often do we practice having hard conversations?
The Dental A Team (23:47)
Totally.
Yeah.
Totally. I agree.
Mm-hmm. I totally agree with you and I tell leaders all the time practice at home. I have thank the Lord he blessed me with Brody I have practiced so much communication on him and watched how it's molded him and been like, okay or watched his Reactions or just how a situation altered based on my communication and been like, okay Well, that was a misstep because I think our kids will always tell us ? and it's just it's
DAT Kristy (24:13)
Yeah.
The Dental A Team (24:35)
training and teaching and guiding them to. So practice on your family. Tell your family, I'm going to practice this. Tell your husband, tell your wife. I don't care. But I do. I totally agree with you. Practice is key. And I think effective leadership and dentistry comes down to being able to have those conversations and being able to back it up. And if you're trying to create a great culture, you're trying to get your team engaged, this is the way to do it. And like Kristy said, you don't have to do it alone.
DAT Kristy (24:41)
You
The Dental A Team (25:03)
You never do. You never have to do it alone ever. We are always here. Hello@TheDentalATeam.com. You guys know that. You've listened to this a million times, but also if you're a client, reach out to your consultant. ? And if you're a future client, like reach out to us. We are here. We're here to have the conversations and we know that you can do it. This is how you inspire culture. So my auction item, Kristy, I think for everyone is to take a look at their leadership style, at the things that are maybe driving you crazy.
DAT Kristy (25:03)
Mm-mm.
The Dental A Team (25:33)
? that you feel like you're hitting a wall or maybe your team just isn't right where you want them to be. And then just have a moment of self-actualization and really look at what's creating that. And is there something that you can do differently as a leader that could get a different result? Because that's how you're going to inspire a team to be solution oriented as well. So Kristy, this was beautiful. I hope everyone enjoyed this deep dive of communication and effective leadership conversation. Thank you so much, Kristy, for your amazing
words, you really do handle communication in a way that a lot of people don't yet know how to. So thank you for sharing that wisdom with us today. Everyone, go drop us a review. You know I love to say that, but I really do mean it. And five stars are always fantastic, but really, truly just tell us what worked best for you. If there's anything that you've done that's working, people really do read those reviews.
DAT Kristy (26:13)
You're welcome.
The Dental A Team (26:28)
drop some information in there as well. And then as always reach out, Hello@TheDentalATeam.com. are here to serve and help you, whether it's through leadership, whether it's through systems that is leadership or really just finding those spaces that are overlooked. I know when we were in a practice yesterday, we found just like the easiest, most simple, low hanging fruit possible to make a massive difference. And the office manager said, how did you like that is, I can't believe I didn't think of that. And I said, you know what?
You're here every single day. You're in it. You're in the thick of it. You're in the weeds. You're busy. This is why we exist, is to be able to come in and see areas that are unnoticed that could make a massive, massive difference. So reach out. We are here for you. Hello@TheDentalATeam.com. And we cannot wait to meet you. Thanks, guys.