Dentally Incorrect

Dentally Incorrect 

TOS for Requesting Removal of Dubious Review


Eligibility for review removal request.
The dental professional (“You”) must first ensure that the offending review contains at least 78% untruths, 22% personal vendettas and zero actual facts about the provided service. You must ensure you have endured a minimum of three sleepless nights.

Preliminary steps.
Before submitting your request to Google’s mysterious review tribunal, you must attempt to reason with the Reviewer (“The Troll”). This includes but is not limited to: Offering refunds—even if they never actually visited your office, sending a heartfelt email that will never be read, crying quietly into your coffee.

Request filing process.
Proceed to Google’s My Business Review Reporting Tool, aka the abyss. Locate the offending review, scroll past all the five-star praises (which will feel hollow), and click “Report Review.” Select one of the predetermined reasons for removal, such as: “Spam” (Even though it’s not, but we’re pretending) “Offensive content” (Loosely defined and entirely subjective) “Conflict of interest” (Because their uncle’s neighbor’s dentist once saw your ad in the paper.)

Supporting evidence submission.
Google reserves the right to ask for supporting documentation, including but not limited to: A notarized affidavit signed in triplicate and a 15-minute video reenactment of the alleged incident, starring you and a sock puppet.


Humor with bite


Dentally Incorrect



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