She replied “Aye, that you did, Father.”

“And be there any little ones yet?”

“No, not yet, Father,” said she.

“Well now, I’m going to Rome next week. I’ll light a candle fer ya.”

“Oh, thank ya, Father.” And away she went.

Some years later they met again. “Well now, Mrs. O’Donovan,” said the Father, “how are you?”

“Oh, very well,” said she.

“And tell me,” he said, “have you any little ones yet?”

“Oh yes, Father. I’ve had three sets of twins, and four singles–oh yes, ten in all.”

“Now, isn’t that wonderful!” he said. “And how is your wonderful husband?”

“Oh,” she said, “E’s gone to Rome to blow out yer’ stupid candle.”

"Old" is when...
• Your sweetie says, “Let’s go upstairs and make love,” and you answer, “Pick one, I can’t do both!”

• Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.

• A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

• “Going bra-less” pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

• You don’t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don’t have to go along.

• You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

• “Getting a little action” means you don’t need to take any fiber today.

• “Getting lucky” means you find your car in the parking lot.

• An “all-nighter” means not getting up to pee.

The Coast is Clear
A blonde and her husband were fast asleep when the phone rang. The blonde answered the phone because it was on her side of the bed. At the same time, the husband began to stir and heard the blonde wife say, “I don’t know! It’s over three hundred miles away!” and hung up. Her husband asked, “What was that all about?” The blonde wife responded, “Oh, some silly woman wanted to know if the coast was clear!”