Professional Courtesy: Everybody Hurts by Dr. Thomas Giacobbi, DDS, FAGD

If you’re a fan of REM, you’ll recognize the title of this column as one of the band’s biggest hits. It’s a fitting soundtrack to a recent Dentaltown message board thread that exploded with nearly 9,000 views and more than 388 comments over the course of one week. The thread, “Suicide and Mental Health,” touches on the critical issues that face every dentist in one way or another.

The thread was started by “drsaul,” a dentist in Toronto who reflected on the seemingly high suicide rate among dentists. His 1982 graduating class of 125 students had a total of four suspected suicides, including the recent loss of a classmate. He used this alarming fact as an opportunity to remind other dentists: “People, if you need help, get it. Talk to friends and loved ones. Talk to your colleagues. If you hate dentistry, get out. It’s not worth it.”

What followed is a great conversation that touches on many of the reasons why dentistry can be a difficult, demanding profession. The central issues focused on three areas: isolation, financial pressures and the pursuit of perfection.

1. Isolation
The issue of isolation can take many forms. Practicing alone, with little access to other professionals, doesn’t help. Townie “TimmyG” wrote:

At D-school I think most of us had at least a few friends we hung out with through the good and bad. But then you graduate and, for the most part, get plopped down into a place with a few 10x12 rooms that you spend your days in, like a mole underground. Any real semblance of collaboration is gone—pared down to maybe a phone call once in a while with a specialist to discuss a mutual patient.

Isolation can also affect dentists at home if their families don’t fully understand the daily stress. Relatives see someone who’s blessed to have a profession with a reputation for high income and “easy” work, adding to the frustration generated during the workday.

2. Financial pressures
The first thing that comes to my mind is the massive amount of debt that saddles most recent dental school graduates, but older dentists have created their own financial pressures, too, through their lifestyle or bad investments. Townie “ttowndds” writes:

A lot of dentists I know tend to create their own misery. They create a lifestyle that needs to be fed, which creates a constant stress. We try to make our staff and family happy at our own expense. We can create a monster that gets bigger and bigger and demands more of us emotionally, physically and, above all, financially.

Living beyond your means can be a problem for any person, regardless of income. Dentists are uniquely situated to fall into this trap with an expensive business to operate and an expectation of a luxury lifestyle.

3. Pursuit of perfection
I find the pursuit of perfection to be my greatest source of stress and frustration. We want our work to last, we want our patient to be pain-free after treatment and we hate the thought of doing something again for free because it didn’t work.

Managing patient expectations is important, and accepting that some things just won’t work is the start of coping with this persistent pressure. Let’s face it—the need to be perfect starts in dental school and with good reason. If you want to be an expert in something, you need to know perfect results. Once you’re in the real world, you will be the primary judge of work quality. One Townie, “raclro,” put things in perspective:

I like the threads here where other dentists share their frustrations and failures. Although I think I see things pretty clearly, it helps temper my negative thoughts about myself when I fail.

I’d like to close by sharing a few of the thread’s recurring themes.

Dentists often listed participation on Dentaltown’s message boards as their best defense against isolation. Having access to so many dental professionals around the world is a blessing that didn’t exist before 1999. (I’d add that working with an associate dentist and networking with a local study club are also great options for camaraderie to combat isolation.)

Financial pressure can be beat with one simple thought: Live below your means. This will allow you to pay off debt, save for retirement and take time off to recharge.

The pursuit of perfection will persist ... but if you can identify procedures that cause most of your frustration, you might refer more, or pursue CE opportunities to refine your skills.

I sincerely hope you can find personal happiness and professional success in your chosen profession. If you need help, please ask! Too often the tragic stories of suicide are punctuated with the following phrase from friends and co-workers: “We had no idea they were in so much pain.”

If you’d like to discuss this column, email me at tom@dentaltown.com, or contact me via Twitter: @ddsTom.

Read what your fellow Townies have to say
The message board that Tom Giacobbi mentions here is filled with opinions and information. It’s a must-read, so go to dentaltown.com and search the message boards for “suicide and mental health.” The conversation will be the top result.